How to Stop Letting Others Make You Feel Bad
Have you ever felt crushed by someone's words or actions? Maybe it was an offhand comment or unsolicited advice that left you questioning yourself. Often, we give others power over our emotions without even realizing it. But the good news is, we don’t have to.
Understanding the Source of Negative Feelings
Often, people judge, criticize, or belittle us when we don’t align with their opinions or values. It could be something as simple as them disagreeing with your beliefs, or even guilt-tripping you into doing something you don’t want to. But remember this: no one can make you feel bad without your permission.
We allow others to mess with our internal "thermostat"—that sense of balance and peace within us. If someone pushes your buttons, it's because you're letting them have control over how you feel.
How We Give Our Power Away
It starts with what we choose to focus on. When someone says something hurtful, we often zero in on their words, interpreting them in ways that diminish our self-worth. We attach meaning to what was said, and that meaning drives our emotional response. For example, if someone tells you, "You’re not good at this," you may conclude, “I’m a failure,” which then influences how you act or feel.
This is where we give away our power—by letting others dictate how we view ourselves.
Taking Back Your Power
So how do we stop letting others make us feel bad?
Pause and Reflect: When someone says something negative, take a moment before reacting. Ask yourself, "How do I want to respond?" Make sure your response comes from the best version of yourself, not from a place of hurt.
Filter the Words: Are you allowing those critical words to enter your subconscious? If so, you’re giving them permission to take root in your mind. Don’t accept what others say without questioning its validity. Not every opinion deserves a place in your self-perception.
Don’t Attach Meaning: If someone criticizes your actions, it doesn’t mean you are bad or wrong. Recognize that their words are a reflection of their own beliefs and insecurities, not your worth.
A Shift in Perspective
Ask yourself: who are you giving free rent in your mind? Is someone’s opinion keeping you up at night? It’s time to stop allowing others to live in your head rent-free. Trust in your own judgment because you know what’s best for you—better than anyone else.
Don’t let others’ negativity affect how you see yourself or how you show up in the world. Protect your mental thermostat by not letting their words penetrate your confidence.
Final Thoughts
The next time someone tries to bring you down, take a step back. Choose how you respond, and most importantly, reclaim your power. You control how you feel, not them.
